Change. Again.

I find myself in a period of Transition. Again. Which makes sense, because I have made several significant changes in the last couple of years. Again. Maybe that explains my recent love affair with old buildings, especially if they are “showing their age.” It helped to unearth a piece I wrote several years ago, so I’m sharing it below. Again.

No matter what sparks your life transformation (change) – something external, like a job change or divorce; something internal, like a “mid-life crisis” or realization that you are not living your dreams or up to your potential – you have to transition from the life you HAD to the life you now HAVE. The change could be “bad” or “good” news, but the transition is sparked just the same. The transition is the process that moves your state of mind from what WAS (what you had) to what now IS (what you now HAVE).

The sooner you identify the start of your transition process, the better. Check out this quick and helpful Check List: Reality Check, Time Check and Check In.

*Reality Check

The reality is, a change has taken place. Admit it! Stay present in the fact of whatever has happened, and that it marks the end of things as they were, and the related fantasies. This is an excellent time to start a journal, written or recorded in some way, of what is happening and how you feel about it.

*Time Check

Understand that your internal clock will make the transition on its own schedule. It may take a couple of weeks or a couple of years. Honor this. The more major the change, the more you may need safety nets to hold you up for however long it takes.

*Check In

Tell people you trust that you are in transition, a period of adjustment to change. This is an important safety net. However, go over your journal. It will give you information that will guide you toward the person or people to Check In with. If you’re in a relationship, or close to people at work, they may ask what’s going on before you decide to Check In with them. Not every friend or partner is the right person to Check In with about particular parts of your story at certain times. Handle the ways that you Check In, in ways that honor both yourself and the people you talk to. Try to remember that most people are asking because they genuinely care about you. In addition, their relationship with you is based on you being a particular “way.” If your way is changing, naturally they will feel uncomfortable in ways they cannot always describe.