Listening and Trauma-Informed Care

I can’t believe it’s been more than a month since I led a workshop at the International Listening Association’s 40th Annual Convention in Vancouver, Canada. Time really does fly! And I admit, it flies faster as you get older. Maybe because there’s always so much stuff to do, great and small.

At the convention, where the theme was “Listening to Conflict,” I started working from the belief that all conflict actually starts inside of us. I believe listening, genuinely listening to ourselves and others, helps us affirm what’s happening inside of us, so we can better handle what’s going there as well as on the outside.

I shared how my journey to becoming one of the organization’s Certified Listening Professionals helped open me up in ways I did not expect. It helped prepare me for the trauma-informed/trauma-responsive, resilience-building work I do now. My workshop combined concepts I learned in The Theatre Lab School of the Dramatic Arts Life Stories Institute, which help me better share what has been on my heart for so long.

My main messages during the workshop in beautiful Vancouver:

Trauma is real, and childhood trauma – Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) – can have a lifelong impact on your health and wellness, as well as the lives of those you touch. That includes the folks you serve at work, in the community, in your faith community, or anywhere else.

When genuinely listening, you receive a message with your whole self: body, mind and spirit. Being in the moment with someone listening this way helps create a space where empathy can flourish, as well as build and/or strengthen connection. Connecting to one another is key. Whether life hands you its worst or best, it’s more meaningful to carry it with someone else.

Let what you know – and not just in your head – inform what you do. These days I feel like we need more people who are ready, willing, and able to challenge themselves by sharing space with the aspects of themselves, and others, that are NOT business as usual. And once they’ve done that, act accordingly. Yeah, it may be a bit uncomfortable. But that’s the way things work at first. As you get better at anything, it gets easier to do.

And enjoy the journey! That doesn’t mean you’re going to have fun in every way on every day. In fact, long stretches of the road may feel like crap! But it does mean to seize the opportunity for growth. Maybe muster up a little gratitude. You never know how far you’ll go, or how good it can feel when you get there. As the saying goes: when you’re going through hell, keep going.

Here’s wishing you’ll find a great listener who will help cool things down along the way.